Haikus

Our assignment for today was to write 20 haikus. A haiku, for those of you who don't already know, is a format of poem originally written by the Japanese. They can rhyme but most of them don't. The structure is 3 lines, the first and third lines have 5 syllables and the second line has 7. The first 10 subjects came from my teacher and the last 10 were whatever we decided.. Enjoy..

Boredom:
Sitting here at home
Staring at the computer
But it's blank like me

Donkey:
You're embarrasing
You're just here by accident
I prefer horses

Juice:
sipping through a straw
Cran-apple, cherry or grape
I feel young again

Kleenex:
I am so sorry
I don't mean to abuse you
That one was massive

Sandwich:
Two slices of wheat
Turkey and cheese in between
What a perfect lunch

Fiber:
I take you in pills
Because I don't understand
What food you come from

Homework:
Working here at home
On subjects I'll never need
I should have joined band

Soap:
We bond, you and I
Each time I step in the tub
You help me feel clean

Gangsta:
You took my new bike
Then cussed out my dog, Woofie
But I'm still SMARTER!

Dust Bunnies:
You're adorable
Oh why do you hide from me?
I won't vacuum you!

Jello:
You jiggle so free
I make you dance on my plate
Until I eat you

Chess:
Strategy and skill
two things I have never had
And still I crushed you..?

Germany:
Red, black, and orange
From bobsledding to Nazis
You guys are bullies!

Squirrels:
You play games of tag
And store nuts for the winter
I think I love you

Recycling:
I sort you from trash
Bottles, cans, and milk cartons
Worth five cents a piece

Jedi:
So strong in the force
Keep peace with your light sabers
Then turn into ghosts

Fax Machines:
You work like a phone
But send papers, not voice mails
What a dumb machine!

Frisbee:
A simple flat disk
You create hours of fun
When I'm at the park

- Not finished just yet but you get the idea .. we had to go quickly in order to finish as much as we could (if you don't like these then consider that my excuse).. -

Stream of Consciousness

Ugh! I'm awake! SHUT UP!.. I freaking hate this alarm clock.. That was a good ream too. Crap, now I can't remember! Something about me.. at six flags.. with.. no.. Disney Land!.. no.. whatever, what time is it? I hope there are pop tarts left. Ian always gets the last pack. Did I have home work? ... ... ... Jackson? No. Vaughn? No. Sabotin? Definitely no. Foster?.. CRAP! .. This computer is too friggin slow. How hard is it to open MICROSOFT WORD?! Holy smokes it's ten after and I'm not even dressed or showered. Screw it, I'll shower tonight when I get home from practice. No time to eat AGAIN. I hate mornings. I really hope I didn't forget anything at home. My car sucks, I'm freezing, what a worthless heater.. .. man, what I'd give for a cup of hot chocolate right about now.. ..

- Again, lame. I know. You don't have to comment that. But this was a lame assignment. I was actually surprised at how poorly I did considering I think ALL THE TIME in a stream like what the assignment wanted. Least favorite piece so far but it'll get better. I promise.

Rudy Rudems - Goes To A Birthday Party...

- The day before I wrote this my assignment was to create an original character. They had to have an age, physical description, a personality, hobbies, etc. Mine character is named Ephram McAllister. He's a bum who has a very sad history (that's for another day). He's mean to the neighborhood children so they call him 'Rudy Rudems' which is what I'll refer to him as in the stories most of the time. As for his thought process, it's not like any normal person. He takes notice in things we take for granted like picket fences and bicycles. He treats everything as an adventure and while he speaks like an adult he tends to slip into childish remarks and thoughts because he never went to school.. ..For this assignment we had to put our character into a situation which included a birthday party.. ..

I was making my rounds down 17th street when an unusual bright color caught my eye. Curious, I decided to investigate. I rummaged through my bag of treasures and pulled out my magnifying glass. I was ready to explore. As I neared the shape I was able to see it was a bounce house shaped like a castle. Kids were jumping and screaming inside as well as playing what looked to be like duck duck goose in what yard wasn't consumed by the giant inflatable kingdom.
I got to the sidewalk, magnifying glass in hand and peered through it. Yes, it was as I'd anticipated. One of these kids was having a birthday party today and it was up to me to find out who. But before I could even step one foot on the cleanly kept lawn a brown haired child approached me and asked in a squeaky voice, "Mister? What's your name?"
"None of your business" I told him sternly.
"It's Rudy Rudems isn't it? I see you sleeping down at the park!"
"My name is EPHRAM, not RUDY like you stupid kids so ignorantly believe."
It seemed apparent that this kid wasn't going to leave me alone any time soon so I pulled out one of my famous catch phrases.
"Listen LOSER. Guess what has two thumbs and doesn't care?" He looked at me puzzled and I went in for the kill. I stuck both thumbs up towards my chest proudly, "THIS GUY!"
He was stunned as I'd anticipated. He stood silent. I smirked victoriously and moved past him. My eyes began to dart around the yard for clues. AHA! Bulls-eye. I spotted a banner hanging in front of the door of the house that read 'Happy 9th Birthday Timmy!'. I got out my secret pad and pen and sketched a stunningly accurate picture of the poorly hung banner. Who was Timmy? I had to know..


- I couldn't finish this again because of the time limit. I wasn't pleased with it but will try and make an appointment to go back and revise some of the parts I wish to change.. .. As you can probably tell I'm not to great with the setting description and my dialog is also lacking.. Those should both improve in time..

My Winter Break... without the letter 'e'...

My youth group took a trip to a camp in a small town for about four days. I sang songs, took a walk, bought gifts for my family, and had a good laugh with my pals. without a tv, it was hard to think of things to do but I found fun in cards and crosswords. I had a blast running and jumping during vacant hours. Thinking about how much fun I had at camp gives me a longing to go back and visit right away. Today is dull in comparison..

- This piece was crazy hard especially since he only gave us about 15 minutes to write. 'E's as you might know are the most commonly used vowel in the English language and trust me when I say you learn to appreciate it by doing assignments like these.. ..